From: Cylvia Hayes

Sent: Fri Apr 05 10:32:49 2013

To: 'Sarah Tripp Stephan'; 'Tolvstad Karen * HCS'; 'LEE Robert * HCS'

Subject: RE: Pull up a chair and get comfy

Importance: High

Attachments: Prosperity_reprise Cyl response 4-5-13.docx;

OK, here’s my take. I think there is a lot of good stuff in here. I will be very interested to hear what Karen and Robert have to say. However, my feeling at this point. Is that it is a bit too edgy. I also think it is too heavily weighted toward the entrepreneurial piece and too little toward the need for investment in public assistance to stabilize people. That being said, I think a lot of the language on entrepreneurialism will be a great fit in that section of the plan (so don’t lose it).

Personally I like the first person approach and I like the “Oregonians are tough and rugged, etc, etc” language. Very good. I like that this tone is very unusual for a government document.

I like innovative. Not so much noisy, disruptive.

Perhaps add a bullet about how much funds have shrunk for public assistance services over the years.

I’d like to lead a bit more with the vision and the hope.

Attached is a marked up copy of the document just highlighting some of my thinking noted above (not actually editing the draft)

I have plenty of time this weekend to help with this as needed. How are the other sections coming along?

Thanks so much,

Cylvia

Cylvia Hayes

First Lady of Oregon

cylhayes@gmail.com

(503) 373-7489

From: Sarah Tripp Stephan [mailto:sstephan@pyramidcommunications.com]

Sent: Wednesday, April 03, 2013 5:15 PM

To: Cylvia Hayes; Tolvstad Karen * HCS; LEE Robert * HCS

Subject: Pull up a chair and get comfy

Cylvia, Karen and Robert - Okay, here's my first cut.

As you get ready to dive in, keep in mind three things:

1. We didn't chat about pronoun usage. I opted for 1st person to make it more conversational, approachable and engaging (and less government-y). We can change if 3rd person feels more appropriate for the audience.
2. The voice and tone is intentionally bold and opinionated, and not (fingers crossed) divisive. When it comes to striking the right balance, I find it's easier to rein in than crank up.
3. I haven't flagged anything yet for Monday's committee discussion. I think that will be easier after I get your initial gut-check on tone & content.

Happy reading!

Sarah